Archives For sexuality


“I have something to tell you,” Jeff began. It was a warm spring afternoon near the end of my freshman year in high school. We lay outside on the trampoline in my backyard, staring at the sky through the tree branches overhead. 

“Mmmkay,” I said.

“I’m gay,” Jeff said in a rush. We both continued to stare at the sky as a heavy silence settled over us. 

I’d met Jeff the previous fall shortly after the beginning of our freshman year. Both of us were new to the private Christian high school. Neither of us felt like we really fit in well. We became fast friends, spending time outside of class together whenever we could.

Dozens of questions flooded my mind. What does he mean he’s “gay?” Doesn’t he know what the Bible says about that? Why is he telling me this? Does he “like” me? Does he think I’m gay too? What does he expect me to say? 

I settled for, “Oh.”

Jeff continued, “I’ve never told anyone before. Please don’t tell anyone yet. It’s not like I ‘like’ like you. I mean, you’re my best friend, but I don’t ‘like’ you that way. I just had to tell someone.”

“Ok,” I replied, still fixated on the branches above us. I don’t remember any more conversation on the subject after that. Continue Reading…

Hope for My Girls

January 13, 2012 — 6 Comments
My girls, Sydney (8) and Rylee (6)

In late-spring 2003, I sat with my wife in a doctor’s exam room while a nurse practitioner readied her machine. I was quite nervous. I held my wife’s hand as the nurse began the procedure. Images I didn’t understand morphed across screen of the machine. After what seemed like an hour, but was merely minutes, the nurse spoke. “It’s a girl!”

Within hours the news was making rounds among our family and friends. Our first child is to be a girl! My dear mother-in-law nearly keeled over in excitement. Then she went straight to the department store and began buying dresses and all things pink. We were having a girl. 

It is interesting, isn’t it, the things people attach to prenatal sexing? In some ways, a bit bizarre. We blast low frequency sound waves into the uterus to catch a glimpse of what is between the fetus’s legs. What we find there is used by the soon-to-be parents and their friends and families to make all sorts of decisions on behalf of the child–paint color for the nursery, clothing style, toys, books, to name a few.  Continue Reading…